Why do we hide from those closest to us? Why would even think we are hiding a secret from God? In the past, I wanted everyone to think I was a good person. I was well trained by my parents to not embarrass them or make a fool of myself. I was scared to stay out too late or ever be caught drinking or smoking. Being extrinsically motivated to do the right thing will last for a while, but if I haven’t learned to be intrinsically motivated, I will violate anything if the structure is not in place. The more I grasp how much I’m loved, the more I want to do what is right. I do not want to hurt those closest to me or those who I’ve built relationships with. Learning to be vulnerable, honest, loving, and authentic must be built on an identity in Christ. Jesus loves me so much that I can’t stop loving Him and want to be the person He wants me to be. We are each born into unique circumstances, with parents, siblings, trauma and crises that few others understand. The more I accept His love, the more I’m okay with others knowing me inside out.
“God’s honesty about life in this broken world is a welcome to each of us to be just as honest. In fact, an entire book of the Bible (Psalms) is a script of the honest cries of God’s people—cries of confusion, doubt, and fear in the midst of the painful trials of life. God never reprimands us for being afraid. He never mocks us in our weakness. He never minimizes what we’re going through. He never turns his back on us when we wonder what he’s doing or why we’re facing what we’re facing. Not only can your Lord handle every bit of your honesty, but his Word is a welcome to be honest.” - Paul David Tripp, Suffering: Gospel Hope When Life Doesn't Make Sense
"Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the Lord sees not as man see: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart" (1 Samuel 16:7) Praying: Oh, Father, You are pure and holy. You continuously search for those who have a heart for You. Forgive us for pursuing priorities that minimize or even replace You in our lives. Forgive us for thinking we can gain approval by our possessions, power or prestige. Forgive us maintaining secret ambitions that only You can see. Empower us, Lord, to see You clearly, that we would maintain a life that is fight and true to Your leading. Enable us to have open hands and willing feet to be the people You desire. Thank You for Your love and mercy, enabling us to grow deep in our walk with You. Amen
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